All is well...right here...right now.

The boys are all off on a guys-only weekend. A Road Trip up to Zeke at college to watch a Soccer game between his college and Kev's college. The soccer game is just the excuse for the trip. It is really about the boys being together. I wasn't invited. I pretended to be disappointed but the thought of having the house to myself and some quiet time to relax & reflect (my favorite things to do) and also an opportunity to get work done without needy-males underfoot...ahhhh, a tiny slice of heaven on earth. It feels refreshing and exciting to me.

I am so pleased that they want to spend time with their father and each other! All those growing-up years when at least one of them was mad at the other or at us...all the times when they only wanted to be alone or with their friends and thought we were from the ice age...all the times when they were embarrassed by our dumb comments...they still have those times but now they are tolerant of us and even enjoy and seek out our company sometimes!

CJ called almost daily when he married and moved to the Southwest. Sure, he was bored and didn't know anybody and it was his break time at work but still...he called home.

Kevin had a tough time when all his friends went off to college and he went locally and felt alone and afraid. He couldn't talk to his friends about it and he opened up his heart to us. Kevin...the quiet one! We hadn't heard so many words from him in the last two years as we did in those two days as he adjusted and sought advice and comfort from us. When his beloved (to all of us) girlfriend broke up with him, we were the ones with whom he shared his tears and his broken heart.... Good-looking, aloof, always-got-a-grin 22 year old Kev sobbing in his pillow and trusting us not to fail him, too.

Zeke, who belongs only to God, and cares nothing of what anyone else thinks of him, wanted desperately to go to a cetain Christian college far from our home but was willing to give that up believing that the sacrifice would be too great for us all.

Beau, who still walks through the door grinning and singing and giving squishy hugs just like he did when he was 4.

These days they're almost grown and all so different and independent in their thinking. They are not dependent on us for much anymore and yet they know that they can still depend on us. They all seem to have a pretty happy outlook on life although we have never stressed that happiness is a goal. I have heard so many people say that their greatest wish is for their children to be happy. Their children never seem to be happy though.

I don't think you can achieve happiness by seeking it. It isn't tangible enough to seek. One can't get it from another person...trying to find someone who will make you happy is a fatal (to the relationship) mistake. Can't get it from money...always there is something that just can't be bought. Can't get it from material things...there will always be bigger and better just out of range. Can't get it from food..well, not beyond that first few bites of heaven anyway. Happiness is a feeling, a result of something else. It is a feeling we have when we have given, achieved, made someone else happy, been given to, delighted in something or someone.

There are many ways in which that unexpected feeling of total happiness creeps over us. Usually it is a result of a feeling that all is well with the world, at least at that very moment in time, even if 2 minutes later the wellness of the world is less evident the feeling can remain ( it's called hope). Happiness is a result of gratitude. If we don't feel thankful, we will never feel happiness. Find something to be grateful for...there is always something if you search hard enough.