CJ and Anah headed out yesterday. They will go down to visit Joey in Springfiled before leaving for Tucson. It will be a long drive but they are young and in love so the traveling will be an adventure. They were here for 9 days and did not wear out their welcome! That is a long time to have guests, I think, in a busy crowded home. Of course, they spent much of their time visiting friends and with Anah's family.

CJ can drive us crazy with his know-it-all attitude and we can drive him crazy for the same reason. We both tried to keep that in check and things went well. It was good to have him home. I hope the tradition will continue. We are fortunate that Anah's family lives in this town, too!

One by one the boys came home for Christmas holiday and once again the house was full of testosterone and FUN! I am not sure how I got so lucky that our kids don't seem to have the sibling rivalry that Angus and I endured as children. It isn't as if they agree on everything but they just seem to respect that they are each different and have different needs. They always have. We are fortunate in that way.

Anyway, having the brothers home has caused me to miss Jörgy very much. I hadn't really missed him too much until recently but with all of the holiday activities I keep wishing he were here to share in the joy of it all. He called on Christmas Eve all the way from his home in Germany! It was great to talk to him. He hates talking on the phone so it was a real sacrifice for him to call and be put through talking to all of us plus Brady's Bella, who was here at time, too. His English was very good and we had no trouble understanding him, which is his greatest concern and the reason he avoids the phone. It made me have that old happy/sad feeling to talk with him. I told him that I missed him and meant it. My boys are not all home without their German brother.

Zeke and Bella came crashing into the house carrying arm load after arm load of dirty laundry and stuff and bringing joy into our home as well. He said he had not done laundry since he was home at Thanksgiving! It was so good to have him home...even baring dirty laundry. The house is warmer when he is around.

CJ and Anah arrived "home" (from their other home in Tucson) on Monday late. I wasn't looking for them until Tuesday and was still in the process of switching Beau's room from a teenage mess to a guest room for a married couple. It was great to see them!

Angus and Beau moved Beau's twin mattress into Zeke's room and flopped in onto the floor. Then they drug the old double bed mattress and springs up from the basement put them in Beau's room. After setting it all up Angus decided the old bed was just too crummy for guests. He went out and bought a brand new one for them. They were so surprised to actually have a room to themselves! Beau had even cleaned everything up and tried his best to make it nice for them. We are just getting to know Anah and she seemed pleased with the arrangement, too, and the privacy. I know living in this house can sometimes feel like a fraternity house with all the guys around.

Yesterday CJ sat down at our computer to figure out our internet problem..we've been without since Thanksgiving and have had two different computer-savvy college kids look at it without result. Lots of ideas and advice was tried and nothing had worked. We were getting advice to reformat which strikes fear into my heart since I've done that before.

Anyway, within ten minutes of his turning on the computer it was back up and running...with the help of a phone call to our nephew Nate and CJ's knowledge combined, they got it going again and we are up and running! Woo Hoo! Who ever said that boy was good for nothin'?!

Anyway, I had really missed the internet... but was able get a little internet "fix" at work. I sure got a lot more done at home though without it.

The Christmas tree had been up a week and I still had not decorated it. No one wants to help with it anymore and it has become a chore rather than a joy. I kind of enjoyed seeing it au naturale and threatened to leave it that way since no one wanted to help decorate it. Sunday I asked a couple of high school girls if they wanted to come over and help decorate the tree and they were all excited to do it. I remember when the boys were little and they felt that way about it, too. They have apparently outgrown that thrill.

Tuesday Brook and Danielle came over and untangled light and strung them and wrapped cranberry and bead garlands and unwrapped ornaments and placed them perfectly on our tree. Brook said her mom was so picky about where and how everything went on. I was easy-going about it, I honestly didn't care what they did with it. I got out the Santa hats and they delighted in wearing them as we worked. We had a great time and had hot cocoa after. I was so grateful! It has been such a no-fun job for the last several years. Now I am reminded of how fun it can be if you have the right frame of mind. Isn't it that way with just about everything?

I stopped dead in my tracks and looked up at the sky. Something was different…besides the snow that had been slowly drifting down all afternoon and into the evening. I had headed out to lock up the roosting chickens for the night and then on to the woodpile to bring in enough logs to load up the woodstove to last the night. It’s a cold night so my mind was on how many logs I could carry and whether I would find the chicken water to be frozen. But something felt different so I stopped and paid attention.

It’s usually totally dark as I walk the same path every night, trusting the way to memory until my eyes adjust to the dark and I can see the porch light on my return to the house. I usually hear leaves rustling in the woods as nocturnal creatures scurry away at the sound of my approaching footsteps. This night there was not a star in the sky but it was bright out from the white snow covering the ground.

It was the complete and pure silence that had caught the attention of my wandering mind. As I listened I realized that I could hear the sound of the tiny pellets of snow hitting my knit cap! The snow was too fine to even see in the darkness but I could hear it. As I listened, an owl called out from a tree nearby and another answered from the deeper in the woods. The conversations went on for several minutes then the soft silence again. I looked around at the soft whiteness all around me. There were no angles anywhere to be seen and all was shades of gray. It was quiet. I was overwhelmed with a complete feeling of peace like I have never felt before.

It occurs to me that my life is filled with constant sounds. There’s the click of the keyboard, the hum of the computer, the whoosh of the furnace, the blather of the TV, the noises of machines and voices and even music. The sounds are so common and constant that a pure silence can grab our attention as much as a scream.

Peace be with you.

We had the grand Christmas Tree Hunt and Party the Saturday after Thanksgiving... earlier than usual but we wanted Zeke to be here for it. He had to head back to college on Monday so we readjusted our schedules. Mom and Dad, Peto and family, DGB and family, Jodie and family, Candy and family all came up to search for their trees. Afterward we came back to the house for chili and fun. Mom's knee is bad so she stayed behind this year at the house to watch the chili and keep the fire going.

Everyone piled into cars and we took off. When we got to the Christmas Tree Farm it was discovered that Candy's daughter with us. Candy thought she was in one of theother vehicles that had already headed out since she couldn't find her when we were all leaving. Turns out Veve had walked out to the chicken coop and was chicken watching when we all pulled away. She is in Jr. High now so was not too disappointed ...perhaps it was even intentional?

Everyone had a wonderful time. The house was crammed with people but it felt good to be together. The weather was nice enough that a bunch of us even ate out on the back deck! The traditon continues now with another generation of little ones.

From a friend:

Part I~

We've had a fire at our house tonight...while we were at a soccer game. A 250 watt heat lamp fell into one of the cages with the baby chicks in it and caught the newspaper and pine shavings on fire. We've had one casualty...so far. The rest were traumatized and singed. The house was completely filled with smoke when we got home, but the fire had burned itself out, thankfully. Other than smelling like we had a bonfire in the living room, there was no damage to the house. I feel awful about the little Buff Orpington, though. There was a plastic container of gasoline just 3 feet from the fire. We were very, very lucky.

Part II~

All but 3 of the chicks are just fine and don't seem to have any ill effects from their ordeal. I don't know why the lamp fell in...it was (I thought) securely clamped to the top of the kennel, and I had another clamp holding it to make it even more secure.

If you know any way to get the campfire smell out of the house, let me know. It's not the acrid smell you think of with most housefires...it was, after all, pine...mixed with a little chicken, if you'll pardon the sick joke. I think the smell is getting better, or maybe I'm just getting used to it.

It was a miracle nothing else happened. I can't imagine why ALL the newspapers and shavings didn't burn. The fire just stopped short of where the little chicks were huddled, terrified. Angels' wings must have fanned it out.

The most badly burned chick is in isolation in my bathroom. She is eating and chirping, but not very mobile. The bottoms of her feet were burned, so it is probably painful to move around much. I put some antibiotic ointment on the wound on her head, but it looks worse today...oozing. If I thought she was suffering, I should ...kill her, but I don't know that she is in pain and don't think I could kill her anyway. I'll wait a day or two and see how she does.

Part III~

I was doing laundry today, and walked in my bedroom, looked out the window and almost had a heart attack. Our bedroom is directly over the basement garage where the chicks were housed, and where the fire had occurred, and what appeared to be smoke was pouring up past the window. I quickly realized that it was the dryer exhaust hitting the cold morning air, and not smoke I was seeing. After what we experienced, you get a little jumpy...

Part IV~

I want to try to save and keep Sparky. She's kept me company while I do all the things I do in the bathroom...she's seen me naked and didn't laugh. I really, really like her. I don't know if she will ever be normal or if she'll even survive, but she's a fighter, and very possibly, a heroine.

Latest news is that Sparky has healed and is now a sweet little pet. We'll see how that goes!

It's not really my "job" to take out the trash but the can was overflowing, tomorrow is Trash Day and I was the only one home. I am not fond of the chore but I hadn't been outside all day except walking to and from the Jeep for work and back so I thought a good crisp jaunt out to the road might be good for me.

I stepped out the door into the cool night air and wondered if I should have put on a jacket over my light sweater. I decided I was too lazy to head back in, I'd tough it out and hussle. I threw the heavy bag onto my back and started jogging along our long driveway. Suddenly, at the curve of the driveway between the big Oak and the huge Elm I entered a different world! I had run right out of the large halo of light provided by the flood lights on the house and into a pitch black nothing. All I could see before me was a splendid view of millions of stars! I could still feel the pale light behind me as my eyes adjusted a bit to the darkness. I moved on, slowly, feeling my way up the drive more than seeing it. It was so beautiful that I couldn't help but think of God and I couldn't help but be reminded how small and insignifcant and short-lived we humans really are in the universe.

Putting things into perspective now and then is good for the soul....taking out the trash can be, too.

What frightens me most about scary movies is that somebody could actually come up with the awful scenarios!... and then that they would choose to share their wicked & warped ideas with others!... and, most of all, that people would choose to watch them and feel entertained!

That thought came to me as I was sitting quietly alone in the hot tub out in the beautiful Autumn morning. It was one of those days when birds flock up and there are thousands that come by out here in the country, gathering in black masses on the yards and fields and blackening the trees like charred leaves. Their calls were so loud as they all complained at once about the upcoming cold and lack of food, I supposed. I doubt anyone who has seen the old classic movie "The Birds" can see a these Fall flockings without having that movie cross one's mind.

I first saw it many, many years after it's conception on some late night movie years ago. I wasn't in the slightest bit frightened, knowing a bit about the nature of birds, and was more annoyed that someone would choose to frighten folks into believing that flocks of birds would attack people. Upon later viewings I was more amused by the actors obvious horror of something so terribly un-horrific. Why were they so stupid!?? Then I remembered that it is only a movie.

I guess that is why I hate Horror movies so much. It feels like they play on people's fears, but then why do we watch? Well, I don't... but many do and I haven't yet figured out why. I have never, ever enjoyed being frightened.

Hmmm...perhaps it is because I am someone that gets so lost in a movie that I totally forget for awhile that it is make-believe!

AHA!

Angus was carefully backing out of the cabin as I cleaned up breakfast dishes. He had just spent 15 minutes gathering his fishing gear, attaching his reel to the fly rod, threading the line and tying on the perfect tiny fly and was now loading up the Jeep so I could drop him off at the stream. He was maneuvering out of the door trying to get that loooong pole when the wooden screen door slapped against the pole. It snapped. He silently brought the pole back into the cabin to inspect the damage. I watched silently, too, wondering if this would ruin this fishing trip he had looked forward to for weeks.

He laid the pole down and began to unthread it and take the reel off. He went out to the Jeep and brought in his old, shorter pole and began the process all over again. I don't know why he had thrown in the old pole but what a blessing that he had! I know that Angus tends to notice the negative so I worried that he would hold his new broken pole in his thoughts all day and let it fester.

I dropped him at the stream and gathered my sketch book, notebook and camera and headed off to do my own thing. I wrote a few postcards, journaled a bit, then decided to hike a little. I chose the path along the bluffs and the stream hoping to get a glimpse of Angus.

The days was one of those perfect early Fall days..very cool in the morning warming up to a blue-sky day with that crispness in the air that one can only feel in the Autumn. I took photos of the stream and the trees and of fisherman and the arched bridge and the blue sky with the white branches of a sycamore tree and its' starting-to-turn leaves and of an old rusty Stop sign. All along the stream I saw people catching trout and I hoped that Angus was doing the same.

He was! He had caught and released several and then caught his limit while watched and photographed. Perfect timing! He cleaned the fish and packed them away in the cooler as I unpacked lunch. We sat in lawn chairs under the trees to eat our sandwhiches and I listened to his fishing stories. It was beautiful.

Yes, he tells everyone had badly the trip began, although it really had begun well. The nice car trip (I didn't even fall asleep like I usually do!), the quiet late dinner, the rustic cabin, the sleeping in (soooo rare), the good breakfast, all happened before the "Pole Incident". But, for him, maybe the whole fishing experience was richer because of the bad part. Maybe he recognized that crummy stuff happens and life goes on and can get better!

The fine fresh trout dinner with the family was wonderful. Life is good!

Who knew a puddle could be so lovely?

We talked all the way down to Bennett Spring on the 4 hour drive and I sent up a silent prayer of thanks for my friend, TK. She had talked me into taking a personal day to go with my husband on the fly fishing trip when he couldn't find a buddy who could get away for the day. I had resisted at first, not wanting to "waste" a personal day so early in the year and she said "What are you saving it for?" What indeed? I usually end up taking them on the last month before they expire for no reason at all.

It seems that as we have settled into this long-time marriage we do a lot less talking than we should. Most of our talk is about logistics more than conversation. We work different shifts and and have so many chores and meetings and kids and commitments....it's no excuse. We do have time together every day but we don't value it. So, we need these little mini-get-aways. I always like him better when we are out of town than when we are home anyway. At home there is always an underlying feeling of stress for Angus, I think. As if he feels guilty to be relaxing when there is so much to be done.

Anyway, TK made me remember my priorities. Her husband had recently been through a life threatening emergency surgery while out of town on business. She got the call from him as he was in pain and heading for the hospital. She left her kids with her mother-in-law and she and her father-in-law jumped in the car, drove 41/2 hours to St. Louis and arrived as he was coming out of surgery, still in bad shape. He has since come home and she is having to nurse him. He is frustrated with his situation and sometimes takes it out on her but ultimately it has brought them closer together...made him appreciate her more...made her cherish life more.

So I asked for the day off because I respect her opinion and knew that she was right...and she was.

It had clouded up and there was a cool, gentle breeze. It was evening, not dark yet but the crickets had already begun their singing. The girls playing the violins were nervous but played wonderfully. The huge trees with their branches swaying in the breeze and sprinkled with tiny white lights appeared to be dancing to the sweet music.

The wedding party paraded through the grass, barefoot, to their places at the front of the seated guests. The ring bearer ran to keep up and left the confused flower girl behind as she reached into her basket for white pedals to toss. She took her job seriously. The bride was beaming with beauty, as all brides are. The groom proudly waited for her to join him...forever.

We sat together near the back and I wondered if he was remembering too. Going back to the place 27 years ago when the beautiful hot August day had whipped up a summer thunderstorm on our wedding day. The guests were all seated, the candles lining the path were lightedand we were lined up at the back ready to begin...when the drops began to sprinkle down. The guests looked at each other...what to do? Angus' sister with her baby stood up to leave. Some of the other guests began to follow suit. I started to cry. The wind was whipped up but the rain held off and my Dad just said , "Let's go!"... and we did.

The guitar music was carried off by the wind. My little sister finally gave up trying to light the candles, disapponted. The minister's hair was blowing straight back, the ribbon in my hair whipping around. I saw lightning in the distance behind him. Everything around suggested the storm was approaching fast and all of my wonderful plans were scattered. But there was Angus, gazing into my eyes, gently trying to slide on the ring that didn't want to go on. Patiently twisting it as he smiled into my eyes and calmed me and everything else was suddenly gone. The wind, the guests, the approaching storm. Just Angus holding both my hands and looking not at all nervous or worried....just being there for me with his strength and not having to say any words at all yet telling me that it was all good. It was all right. and it was.

Beau is a Family Guy Freak. He watches it faithfully and records it if he can't be there to see it live. He is otherwise a kind and thoughtful young man most of the time yet he holds this one addiction. It's shameful. I scold him for watching it, telling him it is perverse and sick as I try to hold the laughter inside myself.... Wondering why I would even want to laugh at such dumb and sick material. Yet it is often strangely satisfying as only satire can be in a sick, sick world.

My "Baby" Turns 16!

Beau is 16 today and he is off with his Dad and brothers on a guys-only road trip. It is quiet here. I'm quite sure that these kind of quiet times will come much more often once he is independently mobile. He can hardly wait to get his driver's license! I'm not really sure he is ready. We have been so busy in the last year... and 4 of our 5 ancient vehicles are stick shifts, which he couldn't drive. I just don't feel as if he has had enough time behind the wheel. He still is so easily distracted! I didn't feel this way about the other 3 boys. When they went for their licenses I was pretty confident that they were pretty good drivers and had been well-trained.

Angus thinks I'm nuts and that Beau will do just fine. He has learned to drive a stick shift and so he is driving much more frequently now...but still mostly in the confines of our small town and rural areas. It will be nice to have him be able to get to church and school activities on his own though. I have been overwhelmed with transporting the boy everywhere since Zeke left for school. It is the first time since 1997, when CJ first got his driver's license, that I have had to do most of the errands and hauling kids to their many and varied destinations. There has always been a brother around to do the job! Anyway, I suppose the driving lessons will continue and there won't be any trips to the city alone until we are more confident in his skills with merging and traffic, etc.

Most of my friends who are Empty-Nesters tell me how hard that first year is when it is just the family's original couple alone in the house again. I am having trouble seeing that as being difficult for me. My goal as a parent has always been to raise my kids to be independent and kind adults that will stick to their values and contribute to the betterment of the world (or at least their world). I'm really hoping that I at least get the "independent" part right. ☺

I love my kids as much as everyone else loves theirs, I'm certain. I must just look at it differently. I have always been able to maintain my own identity and interests separate from my kids and husband, although at times it has been difficult. I have often had to put mine on the back burner but I never let go of them.

There is no doubt, though, it will hard for me when this last one goes on out into the world. Having 3 older brothers he has learned more from them than he has from Angus and I and he may just be the better for it!

He has learned to cope easily with teasing and takes it well, or with a grain of salt depending on the intent of the tease. He has learned that he doesn't always come first and that everybody's needs need to be considered when making decisions. He has learned how to get along with anybody even if they are different (or difficult). He can be very annoying as only a little brother can but knows how to make everyone laugh in the end.

He has had the best of both worlds, perhaps neglected a bit when he was little...no time for lots of playing with him and reading to him... we were on the go with soccer games and school and church functions. He learned to go with the flow, take life as it happens and make friends wherever he ends up.

Now that the other boys are out on their own for the most part...now he is getting the attention that he always had to share before. We can finally afford eating out occasionally and going to fun evernts because we aren't taking 6-10 people out and having to pay $100+ every time we do anything!

And he talks! The brothers always found his yammering along annoying ("don't you ever shut up?") but I assure you, it is rare when a teenage boy will actually converse to his parents! He comes home from school and wants to tell me every funny little thing that happened! None of that "What did you do at school today?" "nuthin"-response from him!

He sings all the time at the top of his lungs. ..and often off key. One can't help but loveit while you're hating it. You can't miss the joy! ...and Yes, he can be moody but he will outgrow that and I think he may just end up being the most likely to live happily-ever-after of all the kids. Keep your fingers crossed and keep praying for him!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, BEAU!

All is well...right here...right now.

The boys are all off on a guys-only weekend. A Road Trip up to Zeke at college to watch a Soccer game between his college and Kev's college. The soccer game is just the excuse for the trip. It is really about the boys being together. I wasn't invited. I pretended to be disappointed but the thought of having the house to myself and some quiet time to relax & reflect (my favorite things to do) and also an opportunity to get work done without needy-males underfoot...ahhhh, a tiny slice of heaven on earth. It feels refreshing and exciting to me.

I am so pleased that they want to spend time with their father and each other! All those growing-up years when at least one of them was mad at the other or at us...all the times when they only wanted to be alone or with their friends and thought we were from the ice age...all the times when they were embarrassed by our dumb comments...they still have those times but now they are tolerant of us and even enjoy and seek out our company sometimes!

CJ called almost daily when he married and moved to the Southwest. Sure, he was bored and didn't know anybody and it was his break time at work but still...he called home.

Kevin had a tough time when all his friends went off to college and he went locally and felt alone and afraid. He couldn't talk to his friends about it and he opened up his heart to us. Kevin...the quiet one! We hadn't heard so many words from him in the last two years as we did in those two days as he adjusted and sought advice and comfort from us. When his beloved (to all of us) girlfriend broke up with him, we were the ones with whom he shared his tears and his broken heart.... Good-looking, aloof, always-got-a-grin 22 year old Kev sobbing in his pillow and trusting us not to fail him, too.

Zeke, who belongs only to God, and cares nothing of what anyone else thinks of him, wanted desperately to go to a cetain Christian college far from our home but was willing to give that up believing that the sacrifice would be too great for us all.

Beau, who still walks through the door grinning and singing and giving squishy hugs just like he did when he was 4.

These days they're almost grown and all so different and independent in their thinking. They are not dependent on us for much anymore and yet they know that they can still depend on us. They all seem to have a pretty happy outlook on life although we have never stressed that happiness is a goal. I have heard so many people say that their greatest wish is for their children to be happy. Their children never seem to be happy though.

I don't think you can achieve happiness by seeking it. It isn't tangible enough to seek. One can't get it from another person...trying to find someone who will make you happy is a fatal (to the relationship) mistake. Can't get it from money...always there is something that just can't be bought. Can't get it from material things...there will always be bigger and better just out of range. Can't get it from food..well, not beyond that first few bites of heaven anyway. Happiness is a feeling, a result of something else. It is a feeling we have when we have given, achieved, made someone else happy, been given to, delighted in something or someone.

There are many ways in which that unexpected feeling of total happiness creeps over us. Usually it is a result of a feeling that all is well with the world, at least at that very moment in time, even if 2 minutes later the wellness of the world is less evident the feeling can remain ( it's called hope). Happiness is a result of gratitude. If we don't feel thankful, we will never feel happiness. Find something to be grateful for...there is always something if you search hard enough.

Principals of Positive Thinking:

~ Our thoughts have power over feelings and attitudes.
~ You can change yourself by changing your thoughts.
~ Positive thinkers use faith to gain control of their problems.
~ Fear and worry conquered by practical spiritual methods; meditation and prayer increase vitality and peace of mind.
~ A positive mind leads to improved health and well-being.
~ Positive thinkers overcome mistakes, forgiving themselves and others.
~ The practice of positive imaging instills the courage and confidence to achieve your goals.
~ Enthusiasm leads to actions.
~ Positive attitudes create more enduring and fulfilling relationships.
~ Positive thinking is achievable by all people.

...Norman Vincent Peale

VBS is over! Woo Hoo! I was the Story Teller and had been dreading it right up until the day the kids walked into the "tent". I was tired of doing Bible School after having done the job of just about every VBS duty at least once over the 18 years I've had kids old enough to participate. My brain keeps telling me that the younger Moms ought to be stepping up. When I looked around at the other VBS workers in leadership roles, most were in their 40s, 50s or 60s! Where are the young mothers? Our church is full of them. Do they think VBS is a babysitting time? Where is the commitment? Are they afraid? What's going on? It worries me.

Anyway, the week went great. Mostly due to the fantastic help I had from some of the High School kids. Wes volunteered for the Story Time right away. I was glad to have his help, remembering his enthusiasm last year. Jackie also wanted to help but didn't show up on Day 1 so I frantically grabbed Danielle as she was walking in and she also helped all week. I ended up the week with 2 more helpers, McKeah and Bo. Those teens made the job fun and easy for me. They took anything I threw their way, totally unflustered by it!

At the end of each day we'd really quickly go over the curriculum and I'd give them a copy of the scripts and we'd choose parts...But by morning I would have studied it more, reread the corresponding scriptures and thought about it all night long. When they'd arrive in the morning I had changed it or added to it or completely threw out the old and rewritten a new script. A couple of times I just told them I would call them out in-character and talked with them and they would improvise the appropriate-to-their character answer! I'd give them crazy props and not tell them what to do with them and they'd use their imaginations and it was great. They dressed up in Bible attire sometimes and sometimes did Puppets. Those kids were awesome!

It was harried all week since we had ages of children varying from 3-year-olds to 6th Graders so we really had to have several different scenarios and improvise a lot. The half hour was too long for the younger kids and not long enough for the older ones! The VBS curriculum started with 1st Graders so for the 2 classes of younger kids we just winged it most of the time.

The whole week went so well and I can only attribute it to the superior flexibility and Biblically-strong and moral youth. I didn't have to explain everything and the whys of the stories because they already were familiar with them. I even made Wes take my djembe and do a conga beat for the kids and we danced around the room singing "God listens to us, God provides for us, God will forgive us, God will protect us!" The kids loved it!

So the Story Time was a success and I am feeling much better about it now that it is finished. The whole VBS was good and the women that did the Music portion were fabulous. Teaching them the awesome songs and also little dances and movement that made it more fun for the younger kids and interesting for the older ones. (They were younger women, by the way.)

I think the children learned a lot about Prayer (the theme) and God and Jesus and the Bible and that is really what it is all about anyway. Sometimes I get frustrated when God calls me to do something that I don't want to do but it always turns out right.

I stepped off the chair right into the paint pan that my son Zeke had just set on the floor. My bare foot slid down the paint slippery incline of it right down into the pond of paint causing me to lose my balance. My other foot landed on the open paint can. I fell backward against the wall I had just painted 5 minutes earlier. I had paint from shoulder to rump and it was oozing between my toes. The good news is that I was totally unhurt and no paint had spilled! A small miracle!

We laughed about it as I had hopped to the bathtub to wash my foot... and discussed the appropriate place to set down one's paint pan. Zeke and I painted the living room this week and we were weary of it by the time of this mishap. What we thought would be a simple one day chore hauled out into 3 days of drudgery. It took 3 coats of paint (at $25 a gallon). I had only purchased enough for 2 coats so when we discovered that the new lighter color was not going to completely cover the old darker one I sent my son, Kevin, back for more. Unfortunately, they had not put my order into the computer as they were supposed to and the paint chip I sent with Kevin didn't come in "eggshell", only in Flat or Semi-gloss. Big news to me since teh original sales person had offered it and sold it to me as such. So new salesperson just mixed up what she thought was right and sent it home with Kev.

Of course, we painters knew nothing of all this since Kev just brought the paint back set it down and left again without giving the details of the purchase. I had been painting all the corners and edges while Zeke was rolling out the middle. He started with the new paint. It looked as if it didn't match but he was laying wet paint on dry so it never does look like it will match. It wasn't until we thought we were finished and the paint was dry that we discovered that none of the edges matched the middle.

We had to repaint all of the edges with the new paint. Edging is the worst part of apinting and we were both so sick of painting by then. My shoulder ached from raising my arm above my head painting next to the ceiling. Now my house is painted...but not in the color that I had originally chosen but by the time we finished I was so sick of painting that it could have been barf green and I would not have cared.

Lesson learned:
1. Make sure you have enough paint to begin with and that your order was exactly entered into the computer.

2. Pay attention to where you set your paint pan, can, brush, etc.

3. Watch where you put your feet!

4. Throw your paint roller out and buy a new one when you need it. It takes forever to wash out all of the paint...no exaggeration. Paint rollers are cheap.

5. Watch for drips that don't show up until you have moved on. They are hard to fix once the paint is dry.

6. Make sure you really like your paint partner.

7. A puddle of paint spilled while holding your paint pan and not paying attention will come out of your carpet if the color is similar enough, you have a big spoon to scoop up as much as you can, you have several wet towels you don't care if get ruined, and you have a good shop vac to suck up the water you ahve poured on several times to dilute the paint after each toweling.

Life is good! 

The doorbell rang and I opened the door to an old man I'd never seen before. He reported to me that "Looks like someone's driven through your fence and your cows are out in the road." I hurried to wake my son, Zeke, who was sleeping in. I grabbed a couple of buckets of corn had ran out to the pasture. Sure enough, the fence was down, completely flat for 20 feet or so. The tire treads showed that someone had missed the turn and gone right through clear into the field taking out fence posts, fence and barbed wire with it.

I cajoled our 2 steers back inside with the help of the corn and checked out the fence while I waited for Zeke. He came out with acouple of pairs of fence pliers and a roll of wire. Three posts were completely broken off at the ground and 2 more were bent. The barbed wire was still there. The fence was crumpled and there was a piece missing. Must be on the grill of the vehicle still. I went and got a fence post out of my garden and found a roll of old fence behind the old playhouse. I couldn't lift it into the Jeep so I had to kind of flip one end in and then lift the other end in.

For three long hours we worked on trying to repair the fence well enough to prevent another escape. It was just a patch job and we didn't have the right equipment but we were able to get it done well enough. We were sweaty and tired by the time we finished but I felt good...a sense of accomplishment. It's a feeling that I think is rare in society today.

Beau left for Camp Galilee this morning. He only got back from the Sonshine Festival yesterday and he was so wiped out the I hardly even got to talk with him about his 4 day trip to the Minnesota Christian Rock Festival. I did learn that temperatures were in the mid 90°s the whole time they were there...not good camping weather. He is recovering from Mono and supposed to be getting losts of rest but he is 15! He has no time to rest! He did take a nap everyday and slept late (hit the sack late, too, I'm sure).

The bus had a flat tire an hour from home. Fortunately they were near a town and, after 3 tries, found a place that had the right kind of tire and could put it on the bus. Everyone except Beau got off the bus when they came to repair it, except Beau. While the other kids went to McD's, he slept on the floor of the bus for the hour and half they were delayed. He did not even find out that it had happened until they reached they got back someone finally awakend him!

Now he is off to church camp for another week. I have missed him. He is my "Baby", the youngest of my 4 sons. He is a true Free Spirit and I have an idea that we are really in for it with his high school years. When he was 2 or 3 years old I told him he was getting so grown up! I commenting that I would judt have to stop calling him my baby. He looked right in my eyes and told me very matter of factly, "I'll always be your baby...even when I'm a grown up Cowboy." Yes, he does understand his place in the family and he relishes it.

We were running late for my neice's birthday party. Zeke had borrowed my car earlier and informed me as we hurried to the vehicle that the gas light had come on earlier and he had put $5 worth of gas in it....not much gas at $2.39 a gallon. Sure enough, on the way into the city, the light came on again. I'd get more on the way home.

They were resurfacing the highway of the Northbound lanes and traffic was backed up for miles. It was nearly 6 p.m. so I supposed that some of it was left over rush hour traffice. I was grateful that we were headed South and was just wondering if I should phone my husband, Angus, and advise him to take another route home when Zeke pointed over to the Northbound lanes and said, "Hey, there's Dad." Too late. He'd be suffering too since it was still 90° out and his old pickup doesn't have airconditioning. Zeke called himto let him know what he was in for and Angus said he had just come up on it and was already at a stand still. Of course, there had been no signs warning of the construction.

We arrived at the party and there were still a few hotdogs left and the cake had not yet been cut. Lexi was shy at first with all eyes upon her but at 2 she soon forgot the audience and was happily ripping into her gifts. Zeke's present of a small drum set was a hit with her but much less so with her parents. My sister (Lexi's mom) looked over at me and said, "ah, payback time." We smiled.

When we headed home it was after 9 p.m. and I decide that we had enough gas to get back to town and I could get it where I knew they'd take my check. I hate to put it on the credit card. I had completely forgotten about the road repairs as we chatted about the party. The road crew must've been working throught the night because we hit the long line of slow moving cars. The traffic was mo better than it had been earlier in the evening. I eyed the gas guage and thought we'd be okay. There was not choice now anyway. We were in it, no more exits. We waited; stop, crawl, stop again. Zeke pointed to tracks in the grass where somebody had decide to make his own short cut over to the gravel road that ran along side the highway. On we went as I watched the little red arm on the gas guage sink lower. We passed a car in the median with the hood up. I watched the arrow touch the big E and realized we were still several miles from the next gas station and wondered if we would be in that situation soon. Zeke again pointed to the gravel road and suggested that we make a getaway. It was completely dark by now and I worried that there might be something lurking in the grass that was hidden...like a huge ditch or something. We crawled forward and the guage dipped lower. Zeke finally said, "Mom, this is our last chance. That road turns up here." Sure enough, we were coming to a little overpass over the little Fishing River. The gravel road was still running parallel to the highway but it was way up a hill now. Okay, now I was worried. Which would be riskier? My option was fading fast. At the last possible moment I made my escape! Up the steep hill I went gunning it for momentum. There were no ditches or even bumps but it was very steep and the car stpped about 5 feet from the top. I eased my Jeep Cherokee back down the hill and put it into 4 wheel drive and tried again. The time it was easy. He cimbed right up and ove. As soon as I crested the hill I hit the brakes. There in front of the car was guard rail! I couldn't get onto the road here. I couldn't back up or I'd be going back down that hill but there was just enough room to turn and pull forward along the rail. The I started backing up along the ridge of the hill for about 20 feet to the end of the guardrail and tehn I was able to pull onto the road. Woohoo! My son reached over and honked a "we're free!" signal to those down below who were surely entertained by our dilemma.

We had no idea where this road would take up but knew that it had to eventually hit one of the roads that run through town. It wound around a lot but finally did hit a paved road. Where were we? Zeke recognized it and turned me right onto the road though a new housing development. We were on the same road that the gas station is. We filled it up and I had had a gallon left? Plenty to get to town under normal conditions...but with all the idling and stop and go? I don't know. I know it wouldn't have been as much fun as our little off-road adventure!

My thornless black raspberries are ripe! None of us are great fans of blackberries so they often go to waste. This year I decided to make jam with them. I found a recipe for Bumbleberry Jam in Guidepost Mag in which you use mixed berries and rhubarb to make an easy, yummy jam with whatever berries are available. Sounded good to me. If it turns out well I can use the same recipe for all jams I want to make as the berry season changes.

I went to the Farmer's market to buy the rhubarb and also bought some good looking blueberries. Blueberries are also not a favorite in our family but they are supposed to be very good for you so I thought I'd throw in a pint when making my Bumbleberry Jam.

I bought a couple dozen jelly jars at the grocery store and some pectin. I thawed a bag of strawberries I had frozen in June and went online to check out the University of Georgia's Extension advice on processing jam. I found my huge canning pot in the basement but could not find my canning tongs or jar funnel. My husband had made Salsa several years ago when we had a big tomato glut. He did a great job but who knows where he decided the equipment should belong after he was finished. He is family-famous for not liking where something is kept, or deciding it is not used often enough to keep handy or even to keep at all so I did not spend a lot of time searching for these items. I'd just make do.

Now I was ready! I'd been preparing for a couple of days and was now worried that my berries would be going bad and I must get on with it! I gathered all the items I'd need and set to it! It was all pretty uneventful except the horrible mess made because I did not have the canning funnel. While I was stirring the berries and waiting for them to come to a rolling boil I thought of my first time canning. In my mind it has become the "Adventure in Canning".

I was young at the time. Having been raised a pure suburbonite, I didn't know much about canning or gardening or even cooking for that matter. My new husband, Angus, was city-born and raised and yet we both were country kids at heart and had decided that was the life we wanted to live. So we had settled on 10 acres outside of a rural community that was outside of a town that was outside of the city. In other words, we live in the country but the city is within an hour's drive. It seemed perfect and we were determined to learn the ways of the country life we had dreamed of. Oh, there are so many good stories of the many terrible/funny mistakes we made and the people who took us under their wing and bailed us out!

But I am telling about my first time canning. I had bought an ancient pressure canner at a Garage Sale but, of course, there was no longer the instruction manual that goes with it. I went to the library and found a book that would help and researched my wedding-gift cook books. All of them gave instructions but also gave the advice to refer to the directions with the canner. Hmmm.

My three year old son had helped snap the beans. They were cleaned and ready and so was I. It was nearly midnight by the time I was actually putting the jars into the pressure canner for the last part of the process. I hadn't gotten started until the kids were snugly and soundly asleep. Angus had also gone to bed since he had to arise early to get to his job in the city. I was on my own.

The jars were in but I was having a lot of trouble with the sealing gasket on the canner and the huge, heavy lid that was supposed to be screwed on. I had practiced doing it before there was boiling hot water in it and didn't have too much trouble but now I was having a lot of difficulty. I remembered when I was a child my mom cooking something in her pressure cooker and I also remember the stain on the ceiling of our kitchen that we had forever-after when something tomatoey exploded out. So I knew the danger that could be involved in this kind of liquid-under-pressure experiment.

I finally got the lid screwed on satisfactorily and now I just needed to watch the guage and time it and finish up. I was hot and weary by then but once started you can't just say "Oh, I think I'll finish in the morning." I was wearing a hugh loose sundress (without a bra) which was the most comfortable, cool thing I could find for the long, hot duty... but I was still sweaty.

I was standing close the the stove, watching the guage slowly, much too slowly, move its little red arm higher and higher. The pot was jiggling and hissing which I took to mean we were almost finished and my aching body, and especially my tired, thong-wearing feet, would soon rest.

Suddenly, and without warning, boiling, bubbling hot water spewed out of the pot from under the lid! It shot out 2 feet in every direction like the rays of the sun shooting steaming lava. There was no time to think but my body reacted. My aching feet shot backward, my middle pulling away from the spurting water. It subsided as quickly as it had come once the pressure was released. It took me a minute to realized what had just happened. I was still standing, in the middle of the kitchen now, leaning over at the waist with the front of my dress, totally saturated with hot water, dripping onto the flooded floor.

When I had jerked my body away from the water my loose cotton dress had stayed where it was, hanging like a curtain in front of me. It had stopped the hot water, absorbed some and sent the rest downward to the floor where my feet had already long gotten out of the way. I was stunned for a moment. I was completely unharmed, unburned! It did not seem possible! There had been a few hot splatters on me but nothing else at all. The entire kitchen - stove, counters, floor- was drenched...yet I was not. I sent up a "Thank you, God" and this was the first time I ever thought of the possibility that maybe there was such a thing as a Guardian Angel and maybe I have one.

Just dropped off my 15 yr. old, Beau, for the bus headed to the Sonshine Festival, a 4 day Christian Rock festival in Minnesota. It's early in the morning and he was very grumpy so we did not have a good farewell. He is the youngest of my 4 sons so I am used to sending kids away to places like camp and college and marriage. I have found that they always come back sooner or later, at least to visit but, for some reason, it is a bit harder with the "baby". Especially when he is in a bad mood and Mom doesn't even get a friendly wave good-bye let alone a nice long hug that will have to last 4 days.

My nest is emptying at the speed of light or at least it feels that way to me. Last summer my oldest son, Jones, got married and moved to Tucson, AZ. That's a two day drive from our home in rural Missouri.... too far for weekend visits. He'd been living at home with us for 6 months after being away at college for 3 1/2 yrs. It was good to have him back yet difficult as well...for all of us. He thought he was a guest instead of one of the family or perhaps he just had made his own lifestyle and did not try to adjust it when he moved in with 5 other people. There was a lot of strain between he and I but we both knew it was temporary and so we tolerated the situation. I've found that one can endure most anything if we know that it is will end. It's those things that there seems to be no end to, that go on and on and on, that will drive you over the edge.

We had a German exchange student living with us for 11 months and he left 2 weeks ago. He had enjoyed his stay with us and it was his first time to be a brother and he had 4! That was a fun learning experience for him. He was very disappointed though that he could not visit Hawaii while he was here. So we threw him a surprise Luau as a going away gift. He loved it and was shocked that I had invited all his USA friends and so many had come.

He was anxious to go home was so excited. He fit in well with us but always remained a little bit aloof so I was disarmed when he cried and clung to me when we hugged at parting.

My third son, Zeke, is heading off to Northwestern College in Orange City, Iowa in a month. I will miss his presence. He is a quiet one most of the time, although that doesn't mean he is not opinionated. His convictions are strong. He just doesn't choose to share them with other people very often. He doesn't care about others' opinions much either so he is contented with his quietness. It's his presence in our home that I will miss....his guitar playing and singing muted through his bedroom door at all hours of the night and day.

His girlfriend, Bella, is going to the same school so she also is departing our lives soon. It's a 5 1/2 hour drive so they won't be coming back too often. It has been nice having a helpful female around so much. She is a delight and it has been wonderful to have something besides testosterone floating around this house!

I have always looked forward to the day when all of the kids are out on their own. That's been our goal as parents to have raised children to grow up to be independent, capable, caring individuals. I expected it to be a gradual thing. Ah, but life is good.

Okay, I've never Blogged before so I'm not sure what you are supposed to do with it but I figure it's my site so, hey, whatever I want goes! Being a wife and a mother of 4 sons, it is not very often that I have been able to just do what I want to do, completely and totally, without having to think about how it will affect the lives of others. It can be tiresome living like that but it's a life I've chosen...okay, not really...It's a life I've been given and it's a pretty good one.

I don't read much anymore because there just isn't time for it but I do love to read...books and magazines and newspapers. I read about a scientific study done where the scientists made people put a pencil in their mouth and hold it there for while they took readings of the brain. I can't imagine who funded this research or how they thought to do it, but the results are fascinating, although not surprising to me. If the people were made to hold the pencil from the end, it made their lips pursed and their eyebrows knitted, basically a pouty frown. When they held the pencil lengthwise their expression almost looked as if it were a grin. Their brains showed that the longer the people held the pencil pointing out the unhappier they felt and the longer they held it sideways the happier they felt. (I guess scientists know how to measure these things!) Anyway, they concluded that there is something about "muscle memory" that when we use the smile muscles our brain thinks we must be happy. SO...keep smiling! Amazingly, it really will make you feel better...and that's a start.

Gotta go. The day awaits!
God bless!

Still in love after all these years on the rollercoaster!